The History of Pornography

I created this a couple weeks back for the Las Vegas Weekly, who thankfully seem to send a good bit of their more lascivious illustration projects my way. It accompanied an article about a UCSB professor, who created a course on the history of pornography back in the 90s, hosting a talk at UNLV.

As Far As It Takes

Rumplestiltskin:  "How far are you willing to go?"

Evil Queen:  "As far as it takes..."

-Once Upon A Time-

Good morning everyone.  You can chalk up the above quote to keeping an open mind and never knowing who or what is going to have an impact on your life.  For someone who is inclined to look at information and circumstances and make a lot of predictions, I will be the first to tell you that I have been surprised many, many times throughout the course of my life.  I hope that each of you is entering this holiday season with many things to be thankful for and with optimism for the new year.

I am going to use today's "Potluck Tuesday" in the blogging schedule to do an extra ramble for this week.  Let me once again thank you for stopping by and checking out my blog.  One of the predictions that I made A LONG TIME AGO was that this blog would reach the 20,000 viewcount mark by the end of this year.  If someone wants to earn some extra credit, you can sift through my old blog entries to see exactly when I made this prediction.  I believe that my blog had somewhere in the neighborhood of 4,000 views at the time that I threw this prediction out there.  Based on the rate that traffic has picked up here recently on 'Bikini Hill', even if the 20,000 mark isn't reached by 2013, it's going to be respectably close.  What is going to hurt that drive is my upcoming trip to Las Vegas the week before Christmas.  For those of you who don't remember my arrival in the desert in early August, I have the WORST TIME trying to make blog entries from my phone.  However this prediction turns out, I really do appreciate you stopping by and taking the time to check out my little piece of cyberspace , and I have a feeling that you will be joined by many others in 2013.

One of my favorite things about the increased traffic here on 'Bikini Hill' is the appreciable rise in the quality of the advertisements that are placed with my blog.  For so long, the ads that I received were strictly print ads.  Now my blog is attracting multicolored, scrolling advertisements from the likes of companies such as Nike...  "Just Do It..."  ;)

One of the high points of the past few days for me came on Sunday, and this was as the result of me acting like an idiot at work on Saturday night.  There was no one at my station when some of my friends showed up, and my newest friend in the group had a beer bottle, so I gave her a cup to pour it in.  She tried to step by me about three times, and I told her about three times that the beer must be poured into the cup.  At this point, she told me that she was just trying to get out of the way of the guy who was standing in line behind her, and I felt COMPLETELY STUPID...  The neat thing about this story occurred when I went into work the next day to get my schedule before making my trip to San Antonio for my "Chinese Thanksgiving" with my dad.  As I was leaving the area behind the bar, this girl summons me from her bar stool, the first that I had seen of her until this point.  I motioned to her that I would be there in just a second, came out from behind the bar, and as soon as I reached her, we both INSTANTLY started apologizing to each other for what had happened the night before...  Again, I'm really sorry Jackie.  Thank you for taking it in stride...  :)

My week-long trip to Las Vegas is now a mere 28 days away, and I will write much more about that tomorrow.  One thing that I did want to say today is that I went online last night and discovered that the 2013 World Series of Poker will be taking place in Las Vegas at the Rio from May 29th - July 16th.  The 'Main Event' will be taking place from July 7th - July 16th, with the final nine being determined on the 16th.

Don't be surprised if I decide to make my weekly football predictions on Thursday this week due to all of the games that will played on Thanksgiving Day.  If I like ANY of those games once I start reviewing the lines, you will see those picks a day early.  One prediction that I made at work last night involves the Notre Dame/USC game.  It is not a lock that USC will win, but going into the game with a 7-4 record, and fresh off of a loss to UCLA, I GUARANTEE that the Trojans will show up for this game...  How must it feel to be Matt Barkley right now, returning to school to go 7-4 to this point?  This game could make the season for USC...

That is all for today folks.  Have a good one and I will see you again tomorrow...

  

            

Bad Day

"And she swears there's nothing wrong, I hear her playing that same old song, She puts me up and puts me on..., Oh I had a bad day again..."  -Fuel- (Bad Day)


Good morning everyone.  Well, that was painful...  After going 8-2 on my football picks last weekend, I followed that up with..., wait for it..., wait for it..., a 1-9 weekend...  UGGHHH...  My pick in Lucki Duck's elite blogger contest even almost lost to a ONE WIN team...  YIKES!!!

Now that we have that out of the way, I was able to enjoy an early Chinese Thanksgiving Dinner with my dad last night?  No, we're not Chinese, and it wasn't Chinese Thanksgiving - he's leaving town before Thanksgiving, so we went and ate some Chinese food...  Anyway, before I ate Chinese food last night, and finished the leftovers five minutes ago, I weighed in at 225 pounds yesterday, meaning that I have now lost 6 pounds since I have ALMOST totally stopped drinking sodas and have a little less almost totally stopped eating foods with carbohydrates.

Speaking of carbohydrates, let's talk about my friend Nick, who is a good sport and a great guy.  I work with Nick and he has a second job delivering carbohydrates with melted cheese and several tasty toppings.  Nick agreed to let me share this story which happened in the aftermath of me initially going to the wrong house a week ago...  So it's now after 3:00 in the morning, and we're sitting around the fire at my friend's house.  There are four of us left who are keeping the dying fire alive, chatting, and finishing our last beers.  I was one of the people who was keeping the dying fire alive, which matters in a minute.  At this point in the conversation, we learn that the two girls left in our group (both from Pennsylvania coincidentally) both HUNTED GHOSTS growing up as teenagers...  This was just something to do in the towns that they grew up in, and they definitely both believe in ghosts.  Nick, who I was sitting by, DOES NOT like ghosts or hearing about ghosts, at least on this particular night...  Since I'm the nice guy that I am, and I happened to be breaking branches and twigs to feed the fire, I SLOWLY reached around behind my friend and managed to just graze the back of his neck with the end of a small branch...  This is when he JUMPED OUT of his chair and almost into the fire...  "HA HA Coach, that's NOT FUNNY!!!"  The rest of us were freakin DYING laughing...  And for some reason people say that I'm a nice guy...

The story above would probably remind my younger brother of a time growing up when he was in elementary school and we were sitting side by side on the couch watching the movie "Carrie"...  I had seen the movie before, and this is the final scene in the cemetery, where serene music is playing in the background, and someone is visiting a grave.  At this point, a hand COMES UP THROUGH THE SOIL and the music goes all HELTER SKELTER...  And yes, when this dead zombie arm came up through the ground, I grabbed my brother's thigh and he SCREAMED!!!  In retrospect, I probably DESERVED to go 1-9 on my football predictions this weekend...

On the account for my blog, I have the ability to see what some of the older posts are that my readers are clicking on.  Well, a few times during the past week, people have clicked on my fantasy baseball draft strategy and 2012 major league baseball predictions posts...  BA HA HA if you remember how poorly I fared in these two areas this past season...  :)

It seems that if I want to share humorous stories from work, I will probably never run out of material for this blog.  This past week when I was manning the post that leads up to our rooftop bar, I stopped a small group and had them pour their drinks into plastic cups (we do not allow glass to go up to The Veranda).  Well, we keep these glasses in a tub, and one of the girls just TOSSES HER GLASS into the tub that is FULL OF GLASSES, resulting in a CRASH that caught my attention (I did not envision her THROWING THE GLASS and therefore did not see it while it was happening)...  I was so STUNNED that as she apologized to me, I was looking at her SPEECHLESS, and like she was from another planet...  After her group walked away, I found that she had managed to break two of the glasses that were sitting in the tub - UGGHHH...

Something else that I witnessed a couple of times this weekend was guys walking past me to our rooftop bar at 1:00 a.m. with sunglasses hanging from the shirt collars - way to be prepared?????

I think that I referenced this topic a long time ago in the blog, but I keep seeing the 'North Face' clothing in our bar and around town as the weather gets cooler.  The thought that keeps coming to me is, "what, the North Face of the step on the sidewalk that you had to climb when you entered the store at the outlet mall to buy that jacket???"  Sometimes I can be SOOOOO CYNICAL...

To recap the..., NEWEST blog schedule here, I will be posting five days a week, Monday-Friday.  Monday and Thursday will be rambles, Wednesday will be Las Vegas/poker-related, Friday will be football predictions, and Tuesday will be potluck...

I hope that all of you have a great start to the week and I will see you again tomorrow!
  

      

Five Weeks In A Row???

Good afternoon everyone.  Recently the blog hits have spiked here on 'Bikini Hill', and to the casual observer, there would be several possible explanations.  In the past few weeks, I have been posting more frequently, I have covered the WSOP, we have had original poetry and quotes, I have done movie and bistro & lounge reviews, we have touched on ghost hunting, mistaken identity (of a WHOLE HOUSE), and local elected officials have woven intricate plots to make my life miserable...  Of course WE KNOW that the REAL REASON for the increased traffic here is that the "wise guys" in Las Vegas are aware that I have gone 27-13 picking football games against the spread over the past 4 weeks...  ;)  I went 8-2 last week for my best week yet, missing only on the Baylor/Oklahoma over (over 77 - actual 76), and whiffing on Chicago (-1) vs. Houston (actual Houston by 7).  I am now sitting at 54-48-2 overall for the season heading into this weekend.  And now for this weekend's picks...

Texas State/Navy (over 57) - My alma mater is the new Mike Leach in overs...
BYU/San Jose State (over 47 1/2) - Weather should be good in Cali...
Iowa State/Kansas (under 48) - UT and KU had recent defesive showdown at Kansas...
Air Force (-22) vs. Hawaii - Away from the island, in much colder Colorado...
Nevada (-10) @ New Mexico - Wolfpack hasn't dropped that far, have they?...

Baltimore/Pittsburgh (over 40) - So many injuries here that this should be covered...
Dallas (-7 1/2) vs. Cleveland - The Cowboys have been looking much better...
Indianapolis/New England (under 54) - I think that this will be one-sided, and...
New England (-9) vs. Indianapolis - ... the Patriots are at home...
San Diego/Denver (under 48) - In Colorado, big divisional game, should be played tight...

By the way, the Texas State/Navy game is going to be broadcast on the CBS Sports Network at 2:30 p.m. CST if any of you are interested in watching my alma mater play some football against the Naval Academy...  Have a great weekend and I'll see you again on Monday!

Dr. Sketchy Scribbles

Last night, I finally had an opportunity to catch a DR. Sketchy's drawing session here in Richmond. It's been forever since I made it to one, as something always seems to pop up and prevent me from going. Luckily, the model this time around, the lovely Tenshi no Itami, was really fun to draw, in no small part because of the Lady Gaga cosplay jam she had going on, complete with her own latex "meat dress"!

Some o' my scribbles:

Even The Mayor Of San Marcos, America...

Good morning everyone.  This is another milestone day for my little blog as this is my 200th post.  This is also the day that the viewcount went over the 16,000 mark - well, that is as soon as one person reads this post.  At this very moment the odometer is sitting right on 16,000.  Thank you for stopping by to visit, I appreciate it.

We'll start off this ramble by roasting Daniel Guerrero, who was recently re-elected to serve as the Mayor of San Marcos, America.  I was unable to attend an official roast for our mayor recently, and this really won't be a roast at all, but more of an indictment for the part that he played in the conspiracy to make me feel miserable on Tuesday...  As the loyal readers of this blog know by now, I should have been at the Hard Rock Cafe on Tuesday night watching the Blue October (my favorite band) concert as an official resident of Las Vegas.  As luck would have it, I am once again living in San Marcos, America, and Mr. Guerrero is one of my facebook friends.  WELL..., after winning the election, our mayor's first order of business was to travel west to California and snap as many photos as possible at every Blue October concert that he could find on the left coast...  OUTSTANDING... Even the Mayor of San Marcos, America has it in for me...  Seriously, congratulations on your re-election Mr. Mayor!  In actuality, the mayor and I are very close, as I was invited to attend the Mayor and City Council Oath of Office Ceremony that is taking place here on Monday.  If you need proof regarding the strength of our friendship, I am one of just only 2,857 people that the mayor invited to attend this event...  :)  Keep up the good work sir!



A very strange 'tweet' made an appearance on my twitter account this week...  A Texas A&M supporter posted the following:

     "Serious question:  How many Texas fans who were locked into A&M-Bama couldn't even see their team play ISU on Saturday?  #LHN (The Longhorn Network)"


Now I am a graduate of Texas State University (Southwest Texas State University at the time, don't get me started...), but as a former employee of just over one year at the University of Texas at Austin, I felt compelled to respond to this 'retweet' that I saw.  This was my response:

     "It's funny how A&M fans are still so obsessed with the Longhorns, even after upsetting the top team in the nation...  #envy"


Right?  That wasn't out of line, was it?  If you bleed maroon over in College Station, WHY would you even be thinking about anything concerning the University of Texas after your team had just beaten the previously undefeated, defending national champion, number one-ranked football team in the country?  Very strange...



I am going to confess right now that as far as my current diet is concerned, I did in fact remove two of those Pepsis from my refrigerator for my 'Alex Cross' round-trip to and from New Braunfels on Tuesday night, and that two Pepsis didn't make it back...

On a related note, I should check the Guinness Book of World Records and see what the current mark is for the number of salads consumed by a human being in one month...

I think that is all of the damage that I will be doing for today.  If the City of San Marcos hasn't shut down my blog by tomorrow, I will be back with my weekly football predictions (28-12 against the spread over the past 4 weeks if I haven't gloated about that enough yet this week)...  ;)  Thanks again for stopping by and have a great day!













            

Just Come In, We're Out Back...

Good morning everyone.  I survived the 13th of November.  I was supposed to be living in Las Vegas and attending the Blue October concert last night, if not for my well-documented break-in...  Trying to keep my mind off of the fact that I wasn't living in the place where I had planned for the last two years on being, I searched for a serial killer last night.  The serial killer was nowhere to be found in San Marcos, America, so I ventured south and found him in New Braunfels (yes, the same place where the infamous 'Wurstfest' was held).  In a 110-seat theater at a 7:10 p.m show, I was the ONLY ONE watching 'Alex Cross'.  I would recommend the movie to those of you who like the series ('Kiss The Girls'/'Along Came A Spider').  Morgan Freeman is not in the movie because the character is a younger Alex Cross, but Matthew Fox did an excellent job of playing the villain.  Fox is one of those villains that you watch on the screen and actually get motivated by, not because he's killing people, but because he's getting things done...  :)

So yeah, there's something that I evidently failed to mention in yesterday's blog entry about the time that I spent hanging out with my friends on Sunday night...  I watched the Texans/Bears game at Harper's, came home and published my Monday blog entry at about midnight, and then I went to my friend's place.  To get to the house, you basically drive up a 'T', and then you take the left or right turn.  I took the right turn and pulled into the driveway at the end of the cul de sac.  The driveway already had five vehicles in it, but mine fit, so I parked and called my friend to see if the festivities were still going on, because it was after midnight after all.  My friend Carlos answers his phone and tells me to just walk in the front door, and that everyone is out in the backyard.  I walk in the front door and there is no one in the living room, so I continue through the back door, and there is NO ONE in the backyard...  (NOTE:  This struck me as very strange)...  What I have failed to mention is that when I looked on the dining-room table as I strolled through the empty house, I spotted a pizza box that wasn't a Domino's pizza box...  This seemed odd to me at the time because my friend Nick (who also lives in the house) works for Domino's.  I mentioned at the top of the year that my New Year's Resolution was to "trust my reads"...  I should have trusted my read in this instance, because I was in the WRONG... FREAKIN... HOUSE...  As I made my way back to the front door, I heard some voices upstairs - what are the odds of that, since there are only FIVE FREAKIN VEHICLES parked in the driveway?...  I quietly opened and closed the front door, stealthily powerwalked to my car, and hoped that my windows didn't get BLOWN OUT by a FREAKIN SHOTGUN as I drove away.  Needless to say, I had an interesting story for everyone when I arrived at my friend's place.  Merp...

Have a great day and I'll see you again tomorrow!